Achievement Unlocked

GorbaChavez: One of the twins at v-ball said you were a MILF
GorbaChavez: I was like, "yeah, that's my trophy wife"
Mich-Mich: maybe you should polish that trophy once in a while

The Power to Surprise

GorbaChavez: so guess what I bought
Till-man: civic?
GorbaChavez: close
GorbaChavez: Kia Forte "Koup" (5spd man)
Till-man: that's awesome!
Till-man: you can tear the hell out of it
GorbaChavez: it's an EX trim. I wanted SX
GorbaChavez: so it's the smaller engine
GorbaChavez: but it's zippy
GorbaChavez: and stylish
GorbaChavez: and surprisingly well equipped
Till-man: sounds like it's owner. hey now!

Welcome to you're "doom"

Cha'baller you're reached new levels of chump? 
GorbaChavez: you are reached?
GorbaChavez: I am reached!
GorbaChavez: I'm the reachiest Reach that ever has reached!

Aunt Bunny is coming to get me

Cha'baller: I saw the Beggar's barmaid in her street clothes on my way to the bucks
GorbaChavez: yeah?
Cha'baller: we had some words
GorbaChavez: wait, like "street walker" clothes?
Cha'baller: no, average attractive single girl clothes, like the stuff your wife wears
Cha'baller: not like the stuff my ladies wear
Cha'baller: which is both too much and not enough at the same time
GorbaChavez: I lol'd
GorbaChavez: you've earned your stripes

It's. A. Hot. Dog!

GorbaChavez: fuck
GorbaChavez: this is gonna be a long month
Cha'baller: I recommend you start selling ripoff iPads on ebay; large memopads with I-PAD scrawled on the front
Cha'baller: and vary your "buy it now" prices, set some at $80 and some at $450
GorbaChavez: I see you have experience with this
Cha'baller: remember to open a new ebay account for this venture, "ipad_sales_pro"